This morning during my time with God and it was so cool because as I was praying for Kroo Bay, Lighthouse and faye and cami, I looked at the clockto see what they'd be doing at that moment. It was 11am here, meaning it was 4pm there-time to start Good News Club. I pictured Joseph starting worship; I pictured the little kids in the front row jumping up and down, ignoring instructions to stay at their seat; I pictured the little boy that clung to David every Saturday; I saw Janet and Salmata's beautiful smiles; I saw my Lighthouse brothers and sisters singing and smiling as I gave them a goofy look; my heart listened to the 350 little voices singing to their Father. A huge smile came across my face. It was a cool moment.
I am so greatful for how God has carried me through this transition. There have been lots of hard moments but never have I felt so totally overwhelmed as I did when I returned from Kenya. God is so good. I know it will be more of struggle to transition back to school becuase I want to really go about this semester purposefully. It has been hard to do even at home but I keep myself accountable by asking myself "what if the lighthouse kids were watching my day, would I be ashamed at any thing I did?" That has kept me striving to do better; to live sacrificially and full of love, which was so much easier in Sierra Leone. I am starting to put some of my thoughts together-there is still a lot to be done but even know God is teaching me some hard but beautiful truths. Over the next 11 Days I have to write 8 papers to be turned in as school starts for my semester in Sierra Leone. It is going to be a lot of work and I am stressin but I really want to be proud of these papers because each allows me a way to articulate what I've learned and am continuing to learn.
Well, I need to get to work. I have SO much to do and not too much time to do it. Have a blessed new year.
Haley

Day 2 of being 'home'

Everytime I walk past a door in my house I can't help opening it just to smell outside. Winter smells amazing! In my house is a strange feeling. I know every nook and cranny of this house but it does not yet feel like my home. My family feels like home but not this building yet. I feel like I a living in such a wealthy house. Which by American standards it isn't but by Salone standards it is. I have spent most of the day today organizing my room. It has taken a long time (and I"m still not done) because as I unpack my suitcase I am flooded with memories and my mind goes off on HUGE tangents. Sometimes I"ll just lay on my bed and remember for a while.
Yesterday I slept in until 1:45pm when my mom woke me up b/c my grandparents were on their way to see me. So I prayed for the day and got up. The shower was wierd-it was hot (so nice) and after getting all wet I turned the water off to shampoo my hair (as I have done for the last 4 months). Yeah, can't do that here, it's freezing! After showering I went down to greet my grandparents and spend time with the fam. The rest of the day was spent at home with my sisters and parents just relaxing, telling stories, showing pictures, telling stories, giving gifts, and telling stories. I am so greatful to be back with my family.
Today I am feeling a bit overwhelmed at having only 3 weeks til school starts and what feeling like a million papers to write. However, praise God because that is really my only complaint. I am so greatful for all the "processing" Faye had us do in SL because I have noticed a 100% difference in how I have been able to handle the transition from how I handled it coming back from Kenya 2 years ago. So Faye, thank you SO much for leading us in that. I know you're not a big hugger but I just want to squeeze you because I am so thankful (Luckily for you there is now an ocean between us). I am definetly feeling strange today but God is carrying me through. I also want to thank the hundreds of people who have been praying with me because your prayers are being answered and I am so thankful for that.
There are so many people I want to call and see but I feel like once I am out of the safety of my home and back in to the real life of the US I will get overwhelmed so I'm taking it slow. The outdoors is the only place that feels right to me. I feel like I am in God's house when I am outside b/c outside is always right. Nature is not corrupted by sin and I find so much peace in it (even if it's freezing cold). So I have a feeling I'll be out a lot.
I'll be home today doing whatever I feel I can. Molly is sick so I'm takin care of her and unpacking my suitcase and my mind as I go about it. Thank you all for faithfully praying and caring for me. I can't wait to see those of you whom I haven't seen and talked to. God bless.
Haley kate

River Number 2 beach is the most beautiful beach I have ever been to in my life. That is where we spent the majority of our day today as we ended our final retreat here. It was a 3 day retreat to provide us time to seriously reflect on these last 4 months. We spent time writing out our thoughts, our goals for the next month, 6 months, 1 year, 5 year; I wrote our what disciplines I want to continue to cultivate and new ones I want to begin; I expressed in my journal the fears that are starting to creep in; we ended with writing a letter to our self that will be sent to us in 6 months.
The majority of our retreat was spent at Franco's-a resort run by an Italian and his Sierra Leonean wife. it was BEAUTIFUL and had amazing food. You must ask to see pictures when I get home, although they will probably be Jeremy's pictures because I took all of 5. Jeremy loves to take pictures and is quite good at it, so when I see him snapping, I just don't even bother gettin mine out. I know I'll regret it later but anyways...moving on. The beauty of the place drew me to worship God. We had such a great time chasing crabs (well, I did), swimming, exploring, eating, laughing. From standing in the ocean and looking back towards the shore it looked like a scene out of Jurasic Park. A beautiful white sand beach, backed by misty mountains...kushe God(means good job). The first morning we were sent off to start writing about some questions Faye posed for us and Satan started working. I could not help but feel like I was setting myself up for failure. Everything god has taught and cultivated in me all seemed like they were destined to fall to pieces when I returned. When I stopped trying to write and sort of gave up on the morings assignment, the feelings left and I was able to just enjoy the rest of the day playing in the ocean and relaxing. the same thing happened the second day. It wasn't until that night that I started to realize when I needed to do, I was carrying it all on my own back. I felt it was all my own inability that was going to prohibit me-once I was no longer living with the poor, once the people I spent most of the day with were no longer the poor-how could I still be loving them and living what I'd learned? Ok, so I can't carry this but who would help me?
As we were sharing our goals, one of Eric's was to find a community to be a part of that would share the same passion and zeal for the poor as he now has. That was it! The past 3 days I'd been picturing this with me and God-no more. God calls us-commands us to be in community with people so I know He is going to provide people in my community to carry this with me. And it isn't going to be hard all the time-there will be much joy in further discovering the heart of my Father in it. So I need to re-write my letter to myself b/c my first attempt was full of doubt.
So now it is time for our heart to heart. You are my community. As I come back I know that you will want to ask me about my trip and I cannot wait to share it with you. I must ask that you do not pose this question, "so how was Sierra Leone?" Because to me that implies a one word or one statement answer. Kinda like when you pass someone and ask how they are doing? You'll only get a quick one liner from them as you pass. So if you really want to know about what I have experience, how I've encounter God and changed please don't ask me as if in passing. That would be a great injustice to the people I have met and the work the Holy Spirit has done in their lives and mine.
As I mentioned, I have started to make goals/disciplines for myself. Some good questions may be to ask me what those are? if I am holding myself accountable to those goals and God's call for my life? Because as long as I walk in the spirit, my life is no longer mine-it will only be mine when I am walking in darkness. It doesn't really matter what the question as long as you are not wanting a one word answer.
I have 1 week 3 days left here in SL and they are going to be jammed full of being with different people. So I am not sure if I'll be updating my blog-maybe one more time before I leave. So I need to ask you to start praying. Prayer is going to be what carries me through the hard time that I know is coming as I return to the States. I'll be praying that God will prepare my heart because it is about to break a little more-but God will ment it and the scare left there will always remind me of Sierra Leone. I'll be praying against the enemy and all the lies he will be throwing at me and my team. I'll be praying that I will be filled with the joy of knowing what God has done, is doing, and will do as I leave part of me behind. I tell you for true I am coming back different. If after talking to me you can find nothing different about me pray because the enemy will be winning. I want what I have learned to become a part of who I am-not a part of who I was in Sierra Leone. I invite you to be praying for this with me. I have began to understand the power of prayer here and so I ask you to sincerely consider this for the next while as I come back.
Thank you for being such a strong community for me as I have been here-I have been reaping the benefits of your prayers and encouragement more than you know. May all the glory be His!

Haley

Sorry it took so long KP ;)