my conversation with my Father

There are times when all I see is hurting and loneliness
I need to see You in this, tell me why I cannot see the good?
I gave you my wounded heart and you gave me your love
I came with nothing to offer and you gave me your son.
I screamed at you: "Do not be silent!" Now I hear you whisper:

I'm here. I never left you.
I know your pain and I see your suffering.
But I have not forgotten you! I have a marvelous plan for you
but you must wait.
For you are not yet ready but will be soon.
The magnitude of it this cannot be comprehended by you yet.
Wait;
for I am going to astound you.

Father, I hate what I see and feel but I am going to wait in anticipation,
in eagerness of what you will teach me.
You will show me new ways to love and to be loved.
My head tells me to be angry but my heart knows you
and has told me to be excited.
For through this test of faith I am going to know you so much better
and that is all I live for.
I give you all of me.
I know I am used and wounded but I give it all to you,
The good and the bad.
I will not let my past control me any longer.
You love all of me;
what is seen and what is hidden in shadows,
what I will not show others.
I care not what others think for I realize that to live for you is to truly live!
Thank you for this revelation!

Amen